Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Coupons For Fun and Profit

I admit it. I love coupons. Always have.

Some people have to keep a bag of beans in their pantry, a safeguard against starvation should mass looting and rioting occur. Some even have boxes of leftover Y2K staples, just in case someone miscalculated the real date for the apocolypse. Well, I have a cigar box full of coupons.

Maybe they'll become the new currency someday, who knows. With the US three-trillion dollars into debt, something has to give. I seriously doubt we have three-trillion dollars in gold bars lying around in Ft.Knox, KY. Or wherever The Powers That Be keep all the collateral for their bank notes and foreign aid promises.

All I know is that when I take off for the grocery store with a fistful of bar-coded coupons, I feel empowered and ridiculously wealthy. I might spend $200 on store items, but by God, I get $13.56 off in coupons!

I'm signed up for the Coupon Cabin online. I scour the Sunday edition of the Lexington Herald for coupons. I'm even so anal that I tally up all my used and usable coupons at the end of the month to make sure that I've garnered enough cash from the weekly coupons to pay for the subscription. I mean, I know I'm addicted to doing the crossword six days a week now (and that's only because they don't publish my crossword on Sunday, the rats) and I'd most likely keep the subscription just for that, but the coupons are the ice cream on the cake.

I saw a new site for couponing on TV a couple of nights ago and of course, since I keep the laptop by the bedside, I immediately fired up the old' G4 and went to the site to sign up. A new coupon site for me is like a new Tom Robbins book – something I have to have the minute it hits the shelves or, in this case, the Web. Of course, the other four million coupon addicts were grabbing their laptops and trying to sign up at the same time, so I'll have to access it later, when the mass frenzy to obtain a 30-cent off coupon for Marie Callender's Turkey Pot Pies has calmed down. But I'll get there. You can be assured of that.

Kroger's, the local grocery store, sends out coupons via snail mail to me based on my previous purchases. They're exceptional coupons, and they make the drive in to Maysville, 20 miles away, more than worth the effort. I mean, really. A dollar off butter? I'm so there. Not to mention they double manufacturer's coupons up to 50-cents, which is an added incentive to go the extra mile(s).

I know, in the back of my frugal brain, that couponing can be a sickness of the mind. You can start buying things you wouldn't have in your house normally, and thus spend money on stuff you won't eat or use, negating the whole purpose of couponing. But those rebate coupons, you know, the ones that say, "Try this FOR FREE!" – well, I snap them up every time. And I dutifully send them in, and in six or seven weeks, get my $3.99 back and I feel vindicated. I like to look at those coupon rebates as an investment. In the end, I get a free product (that I may or may not like) and still get my money back. Last time I bought a rebate product, it was the new Arm & Hammer Multi-Surface Degreaser, that you fill with water, their attached vial of lemon oil and magic, and you have a full container of cleaner. I got my money back on that one already, bought two refills (with the accompanying $1.00 off coupon) and still have over half of the product left (and two refills) for less that $1.50. How do these companies stay in business? And, the darned stuff works like a grateful employee with two kids to feed, plus it's a non-chemical alternative to other cleansers, which I'm trying hard to stay away from.

There are some folks that deem coupons to be a waste of time and effort, not worth the trouble of cutting out with scissors and throwing in a box. Some are embarassed to present their coupons, for fear that someone in back of them in the check-out line will think they (insert gasp here) NEED to use coupons. I say, balderdash. Too bad for them (she says, as she clutches her check-out receipt which shows a combined savings of $32.90 from store specials and beloved coupons). 

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