Thank GOD That's Over

I survived working in the retail world yet another Christmas season! I consider that pretty close to a miracle, and along the same lines as the parting of the Red Sea.

Christmas for me has become my own personal New Year. I consider what happens at Christmas to be a possible beginning of things to come. As Jacob Marley would say, "the chains forged in life become the chains you wear in death..." Well, this Christmas was certainly a trial in many ways. I have been artistically frustrated for months now, with no time to create, just time to get up, go to work and come home. My dogs don't even know who I am any more. On top of that, the customers at Michaels seemed a little more rude than usual, and with our customer service policies, this normally outspoken gal had to keep duct tape over her lips for a couple of weeks.

I'm in a beautiful home that practically takes care of itself, and Per Hans makes sure that if something needs to be done, it gets done. The sunsets are becoming increasingly awesome, Flagler and Hammock Beaches are a little less populated, so beach combing becomes a lot more personal and now that the holidays are over, I can get back to normal routines, which I desperately need right now. I have a trip to Tuscany to plan and save money for, after having used up all my mad money in Buenos Aires, Argentina. And, at least four festivals to do between now and then, so there is that...

I toasted past loves and past lives with my traditional Dewars and water, ate way too many cookies and spent way too much money this season. Time to tighten the financial belt, pay off the credit cards, drop a couple of clothing sizes and keep a check on the attitude. I don't make resolutions. I just start doing things differently.

I'm cleaning out old files and lightening my emotional burden by tossing old photographs and old e-mails. The buildings I had in Kentucky have now been sold at auction to pay off my former husband's IRS debt, so I suppose my memories need to be laid to rest. Still driving Big Red, and she's at 244,000. But, she no longer has to pull a trailer, so she may last a bit longer - at least until I take ownership of my yellow Jeep. I'm just not sure I can let her go - she's become so much a part of my history.

I think I'm seeing things with a lot more clarity now. I've literally been under an emotional fog for three years or more and I've seen myself make some bad choices since then, and I strayed from my original intentions. Positive will come from it all, though, and if not, I will be alright.

Cause I got what it takes.