I'll be Chewin' On a Honeysuckle Vine...

So, once the holiday season has crested and peaked and I'm on the downslide of toothpick appetizers and chocolate everything, all becomes quiet and I reflect on the past year.

I have had a most amazing year. After being emotionally betrayed and left for dead in an email by Former Husband last year, right before Thanksgiving and immediately after he acquired a Jeep by sisterly means (yes, it was a choice, and the Jeep won - sister hated me the first time I married the man), I swore off relationships. No time to get hurt again. Then, quite by accident, I met the man who has got me thinking in terms of "us" again.

I wanted to move by the ocean. I am now happily entrenched in battling salt-air corrosion of anything battery-powered and just one wafting sea-breeze on a balmy night will bring tears to my eyes. I always wanted to live "somewhere off A1A" and now I do. There is no replacing the realization of "this-has-really-happened" and the soul-wrenching gratitude to the amazing series of events that allowed this to happen.

I wanted to heal. I needed to salve the wounds both self-inflicted and caused by others, once and for all. I needed to see people for who they are (and were) and to openly and truthfully forgive and accept. That was a tough one but you know, walk the walk. You can fill your brain with the wisdom of ancients but unless you are prepared to embrace the amount of gooey karmic junk that comes with shaking hands and walking away from the drama, it doesn't count.

This is the first season I did not raise a toast of Scotch to Alex, talk about my childhood or regret my past transgressions. This is the first year I was able to move on from so many rips in my fabric. It was  the first year I didn't look back because I have so much to look forward to.

I still have shadows, but they are not mind-numbingly overpowering. Buffett's "Tin Cup Chalice" fits me to a tee. I dance again. I smile a lot. I enjoy the world.