Generators Need Oil?

Day Two of Irma’s aftermath, and I have become intimately attuned to my little Ryobi generator.

To me, pouring gas in it was an achievement on my own. But, when it stopped after running four hours today, I was flustered. I checked the gas and it was all good. Unplugged the one cord, tried to start it, and….nothing.

I could not call my hubby at work, because A) He never answers his phone and B) He never answers his phone. So, I grabbed the neighbor and forced him at gunpoint to come look at my generator. Well, not really gunpoint. But I did give him the hairy eyeballs. He sauntered over and said maybe it was the oil.

Oil?

You know, it never occurred to me that you needed to check the oil.  It was like my Toro lawnmower all over again.  I sold it because it wouldn’t start and I didn’t know enough to realize they have oil sensors, and when it gets low, they fold their arms over their chest and will not start, no way, no how. I have an electric lawn mower now, because my little patch of lawn is now roughly 100 feet, but I have learned about lawn mowers.

But evidently not about generators.

I was convinced it was a spark plug.  Not just any spark plug, but an elusive Bosch A7RTV spark plug. So, my mission today, other than to charge up my phone and bask in the luxury that is air conditioning, was to find a spark plug. I found all of the instruction manuals, and, loaded for bear, walked into Lowe’s, which was operating on emergency generators themselves. “Why,” I gloated, “I might just buy TWO.”

Nope. Nothing that even remotely compared to what I needed.

So, I drove to Home Depot, who sell the Ryobi generators. They did not have power, but they were running small generators at the cashier’s stations to run the money-taking tools. You had to be escorted in, one customer per associate. I was lucky and got a cashier, who knew absolutely nothing about spark plugs, generators or apparently customer service.  Again, no spark plugs. “You’ll have to get them online, or maybe a car parts store.”

Off to O’Reillys, who also had no power, and also had no spark plugs.  A guy standing at the register asked me if I checked the oil, because generators have oil sensors.

I looked at him so dumbfounded, he must have thought I was mute.

I came home. Filled the incredibly-hard-to-get-to-without-being-a-surgeon oil spout with 10W30, which is what the book said, and checked the incredibly-hard-to-screw-back-on dipstick until it registered full. Waited the mandatory five minutes, per the Form of Intelligent Life standing in line at the register at the car parts store, and pulled the cord. Nothing. Checked the book. Nothing.

Got back in the car so that I could get cell service (about ten miles down the street) and left ten voicemail messages to my hubby (who never answered the phone) in increasingly frustrated and murderous tones.

I stood in the blinding sun and stared down the generator. I decided to try one more time. Set the choke in “start,” clicked the button to Idle “off,” and pulled.

The damn thing started. And it’s been going for two hours now. I wouldn’t say purring like a kitten, but still grumbling and growling and charging my other Ryobi batteries, which run the fan that allows me to sweat just a little less when I’m trying to get to sleep. Oh, and the refrigerator, which provides me with ice and filtered water. Through the door. Sheer heaven.